Hi everyone! It has been a very long time since I wrote the last blog post.
Now it's year 2020, a year when people imagined that they will live in a futuristic life. But it is not going to happen. Not for now as we are all affected by the global pandemic caused by Covid-19 virus. People can die because of the virus and we still don't have the vaccine for this pandemic. So all of us need to live with Restricted Movement Order (RMO) and have a new norm while waiting for the vaccine and we really hope that Covid-19 virus will disappear.
Talking about how most people hope this virus will disappear, I stumbled across a tweet that pointed out how the disappearing of the virus is similar with the person that we thought we will marry but in the end, we won't. That is funny but I need to agree on that because I know it is true for me. And it will take years for that. Isn't that what the media said about the virus as well?
In my life so far, there were only three women that I really thought I would marry as they were the ones that I ever put their names in my prayers. The first one was someone that I knew as a good friend that I shared many things with her. The second one was someone that was nice to me in many ways but she decided to reject my affections just because I would go far away for two years. The third one was someone that I liked about 7 years without her knowing that I have affections towards her.
There are reasons why all of them are not in my prayers anymore. The first one is because she rejected me very hard that I turned into a bitter person towards love relationship. The second one is because she was someone that made me think that it is not worth it to put so much hard work in a relationship if it is just one person to do the work. The third one is the best woman I ever like because of her character but I decided to put a stop on this one sided love because past experiences taught me that if I am not ready to give my best, I should stop before I get disappointed by my own actions. And she is a very good girl that it makes me feel embarrassed for dreaming to be her future husband.
So, like the virus, all of them will disappear one day. They won't disappear now and they won't disappear forever in my memories like how all of us will always remember this pandemic, but at least they will disappear from the pandemic in me that so much affected in building my characters and ways of life. Until then, learning to make peace with my past is like making a progress towards the vaccine that everybody is hoping for.
